Does anybody want to borrow a couple of monsters?

It was one of those evenings when both children seemed to be out to get us. It started upon pick-up from daycare...Brianna was a beast to get strapped into her car seat. She doesn't just fight. Pushing down on her pelvis, while a common suggestion, is NOT enough. She is strong girl, and smart, and sneaky. I need one hand to push down on her pelvis, one hand to keep her arms from coming out from the straps, one hand to keep her from twisting to her side...and and some duct tape for her mouth to keep her from biting you. And ear plugs would be good, too.

So anyhow, we get home and after chasing the kids down to get them to the table, Kaitlyn promptly dumps her water on her grilled cheese and proclaims she wants a popsicle. I asked her to eat some of her supper. "I'm not hungry"...well then you don't need a popsicle. "I AM hungry" Well, then you should eat some of your supper. "NO, I dont WANT TO!!". Ok then, suit yourself.

While all this is going on, Brianna throws her sippy and slides her plate across the table. Too bad for you, girlie. I give her a few minutes and she starts "asking" for them back, so I give them to her thinking she could have one more chance. And she did eat some of her food, but only after being sure to tear it up into pieces and throw some of it on the floor. And getting mad when I was trying to pick stuff up.

Back to Kaitlyn. She has now asked for a popsicle about 10 times and is getting whiney. I am frustrated and finally we just say, ok, here is your popsicle! ("oh yaaaay! I want an ORANGE ONE!" Fast forward to 5 minutes later, Brianna was throwing a fit and had just gotten a time out upstairs. Kaitlyn pees her pants in the middle of enjoying her popsicle. So, no more popsicle. We need to go upstairs and get cleaned up. This of course sets off a massive fit. Screeching. Crying. More screeching. And this is not ordinary screeching, this is high pitched, blow your eardrums out screeching. Which she does in short bursts in response to every thing you say to her. Almost her own toddler way of saying "SCREW OFF A-HOLE". So I stopped trying to say anything and just brought her to the bathroom to sit on the potty and get cleaned up. She cries "I want my popsicle" Well, little honey, you haven't exactly earned one. If you can be good the rest of the night, and tomorrow, then we will have a popsicle tomorrow. And here is where I witnessed the saddest sad face ever. I held strong though, and we went back downstairs only to find Brianna again throwing a massive fit. Brought her back upstairs along with Kaitlyn and took an early bath. During which they fought over a stupid McDonald's Happy Meal Toy, and Brianna decided it was a good idea to try out her new jumping skills. Turns out, not a good idea in the tub. So she almost falls and *almost* hits her head on the wall but actually does a great job of catching herself. And then continues to jump! My cue that bath time needs to be OVER!

Trying to get her dressed is actually not as bad as it is sometimes and I am thankful for that. Kaitlyn was good as well, so we get back downstairs pretty quickly. Not long after, Brianna gets mad about *something*. I don't know what, but she was chasing me and trying to bite my back side and threw her full sippy at me which hit my little toe (OUCH!) and screamed and hit and cried and kicked her legs and chased me around while I was trying to fix a leaking sippy and gave me dirty looks and was just an all around pill. Finally I decided it was bedtime. (Didnt realize until later that it was like a good hour+ before regular bedtime, but oh well. She needed it). Brought her to her room where she continued to scream and yell and kick things and hit things. I went back in awhile later and said "Are you done". She looked at me and smiled. I hung out with her for a few minutes and we made up. She gave me hugs and kisses and I explained to her that it hurts people when she hits and kicks and bites, and we really need to work on cutting the attitude. Did she understand or listen, who knows. But she was calmer now, and I got blanky and nuk for her and she has been in her room since. She is still awake as I write this, but she isn't crying or banging anything around, so that's good with me. Currently Kaitlyn is yelling at me "It's not FAIR, mommy! It's NOT FAIR", because she had grabbed my purse and I asked her to put it down. Because it is full of stuff and I don't want to have to pick it all up. And because Coach purses aren't appropriate toys for 3 year olds.

So, if anyone wants to borrow a cranky 3 year old who's screeches make your ears ring and who rarely listens to anything you say the first time (or two or three) and a stubborn 2 year old who throws many fits a day and they all include screaming, crying, hitting and biting, and laying on the floor kicking as hard as she can....then give me a jingle.

Rest assured this post will be followed by another brag-a-thon about how amazing my children are and how much I love them :-)